In case you missed the Keeping Up With Kardashian’s: A Very Merry Christmas special on E! this past Sunday (first of all, who are you and what are you doing with your life?), we’ve got you covered! Here’s what goes down at your typical Kardashian X-mas (at least, in OUR minds)…
1. Khloe teaches her little sisters how to give a BJ properly. They’ll need to master these basic skills if they want to get a spinoff show.
2. Kim stares at her boobs..a lot.
3. Kendall takes selfies while Kylie tries to decide whether Bruce has started taking hormones yet or not while he’s sleeping
4. Everyone gets a little drunk and starts saying asking Kendall how she is so much more beautiful than her sister, and she’s all like..
5. Kourtney gets pregnant…again.