Sex is literally the best thing in the world. But when it sucks, it fucking sucks. Here’s a few things to avoid to make sure you don’t have shitty sex. Honestly most places, assholes, and levels of intoxication are fine but these are a few that personally don’t do it for me.
Wasted
I’ve done this a million times but I think I’ve learned (finally) that’s it’s the worst conditions to have sex under. I‘m not talking about a couple of drinks to get a buzz, I’m talking super sloppy they don’t know where your vagina is sex: gross. You’re both too drunk for this to work out.
Sober
Well, this isn’t actually true at all. If you’re comfortable enough with the person, like obvs it’s great. But, smoking weed and sex literally go hand in hand.
With an annoying person
Yeah cool, the chemistry is great or whatever BUT the consequences after are great my friend. Lingering around your apartment the whole next day, creeping up on you at work etc. Yeah, no.
In a club bathroom
I’ve never done this so maybe I’m missing out. But there’s something really unappealing about being crammed into a cubicle, which is most definitely dirty, and figuring out the most comfortable place to have sex: staring at the toilet? sitting on the toilet? Jesus.
Frankie Decaiza Hutchinson is the Online Editor at Galore Mag. She specializes in slow jams, gold jewelry, fried chicken, and hating. Follow @FrankieFatGold