“I Broke Up Like This” is a new bi-weekly series on Galore. Every other week, we’re sitting down with some of our favorite bombshells who we love, admire, and look up to so that we may ask them about their break ups. This week we talked to Bekka Gunther, part of our own modeling and talent agency Kitten, about finding balance between love life and career.
For Model turned Creative Director and Photographer, Bekka (Bex) Gunther, her career comes before anything else. Bex seems unstoppable and it’s hard to believe that someone so talented could have been vulnerable or hurt in a break up. Unfortunately, being a boss ass bitch and putting herself first has sometimes caused her to compromise in her personal relationships. Early on in our conversation, as I inquire about whether her success and her work has caused conflict in her relationships she laughs before telling me, “For sure”.
“I always put my career first,” she says, “quite honestly, it’s very hard for me to put someone else ahead of myself because I’m very driven and I have a lot of dreams.” As she tells me this, I become acutely aware of the work I’ve seen of Bex’s before we sat down for our interview. She’s been a creative director for the likes of California clothing brand Tart Collections, Los Angeles and Veridatta skin amongst others. Her photography, captivating in its own right, displays her knowledge of lighting and color theory that gives her shoots an almost cinematographic feel. It’s clear that even if she took up photography as she tells me, “to amuse myself while I took a break from being a model,” she’s studied the medium very well and takes it very seriously.
“I never wanted to sacrifice my individuality or my dreams for a man.”
Then again, maybe it’s her own experience in front of the lens that gave her they eye for composition, “I got tired of being told what to do,” she says, explaining why she stopped modeling. It seems that sentiment has persisted in her personal life. She explained that as a model, sometimes her partners would get mad about certain photos she took, or her having to hop on planes at the last minute to Tokyo or Milan. In the end, she tells me she ended up feeling like sometimes she had to choose between her career and her love life. “I never wanted to sacrifice my individuality or my dreams for a man.”
And, lucky for Bex, she certainly hasn’t sacrificed anything for a man. When I ask her about her craziest break up she tells me about the last time she dated a guy. But the break up actually allowed Bex to understand how to value herself. ” [It] was a crazy experience that actually helped me a lot.” she says, “I really let myself fall for him, but he ended up cheating on me with his ex finance. It was the first time in a long time that I had opened my heart. But it was such a learning experience for me, because I realized not everyone is all good or all bad.”
“Remember you’re a boss b*tch.”
For girls who had a similar experience to what Bex went through, she has this piece of advice. “I encourage girls who get cheated on or get their heart broken to remind themselves that we’re all boss bitches, there’s no power in staying bitter. Remember you’re a boss b*tch, and feel sorry for him that he can’t be with you.”
“I’m trying to figure out, what do I really want? Can I have both at the same time or do I have to only focus on career?”
When I ask Bex if she’s dating anyone now she pauses a bit before telling me “No”. The same old struggle of whether to put her career first or “take a chance,” on love seems to loom over her. Most recently, she had to end a relationship with her most recent ex girlfriend because she felt like all her time and attention was directed at her career. “At a certain point I definitely could see this turning into something I do for my whole life,” she says explaining how she keeps waiting and waiting until she is more established to prioritize her love life. “I’m trying to figure out, what do I really want? Can I have both at the same time or do I have to only focus on career?”
She’s still on good terms with her ex girlfriend. “I still really care for this person, and I don’t want to just be her friend. But I also can’t flip flop around and pretend like I want more. I’m trying to be very fair.” she tells me. I can tell just how sincere that sentiment is, and I want to gush about how much I emphasize. Being a boss ass bitch really can feel like it’s takes over everything, and sometimes there’s not always room for two.
“…Make it all about falling in love with yourself again, because that’s the most important person to have a good relationship with.”
But even though Bex is working hard to get her career in order, it’s clear that she still believes in love, despite it all– break ups included. “Any advice for girls who are going through a break up right now?” I ask. “I would say, sit down and write yourself a letter thanking yourself for giving love a chance. Whoever just got broken up with, you know, everyone in that situation gave love a chance. So I’d say start by thanking yourself to being open to love because love is life. And then just tell yourself how awesome you are and make it all about falling in love with yourself again, because that’s the most important person to have a good relationship with.”
Check out Bex’s photography and creative direction on her website, and check out the Kitten Agency.